PASTOR'S EDITORIAL
Being Better Fathers
Happy Fathers' Day to all you dads! We hope you enjoy celebrating with us this morning while recognising that we have not always been the dads we would want to be, and not all of us had the fathers we wanted. Our prayer is that a deepening relationship with our Heavenly Father will bring healing to the lives of those who need it, will comfort those who cannot be fathers, who have had children die or have strained relationships, and will empower and guide fathers to be the best they can be.
Most of us dads know the significance of the Apostle Paul's words to fathers not to "aggravate [irritate] your children. If you do, they will become discouraged and quit trying." The Message paraphrase says, "Parents [fathers] don't come down too hard on your children or you'll crush their spirits." (Colossians chapter 3 verse 21)
Fathers have a greater tendency to apply tougher discipline to their children than mothers, which can lead to discouragement. Thankfully we talk more openly about parenting matters these days and we fathers are more conscious of being encouraging and supportive while providing clear boundaries for our children.
The gift that we have arranged for families to buy for fathers today is called, 'The Best Principles Ever on How to Be a Dynamic Dad'. It comes from Family Life NZ, well known for their Marriage Weekends.
In the kit they provide a dvd of 14 inspirational 'Dad Stories', two little booklets on '25 Things to do with your Daughter/Son' and a card with ten questions to use in one-on-one times for Dads with their children. They ask, "Why not take your child to breakfast at McDonalds and get to know them better by asking these questions. They will enjoy it! Listen without interrupting and take genuine interest, even if the answers don't please you." They suggest taking notes to show you're really interested! The questions are:
1. What do you enjoy most about our family?
2. How would you describe your ideal day (from morning to bedtime)?
3. What two problems, if fixed, would make the most positive difference in our family?
4. Do you know what you'd do if our house caught fire?
5. If you had to leave our house in a hurry [and it wasn't a fire!], what three things would you take with you and why?
6. Who are your three closest friends? What do you enjoy about each one?
7. Are there some things I do that annoy or embarrass you? (Remember, just listen)
8. In what way would you most like to see me change, as your dad? (Remember, just listen)
9. Is there some secret that you're keeping from me because you're scared that I would love you less?
10. If you were mum or dad in our family, what would your top five rules be?
Please give it a try and let me know how it goes.
Shalom, Steve
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